Tired of no longer being respected by alyx (I never lost faith!), JPM head honcho Jamie Dimon is ready to reclaim his title as CEO You’d Least Want To Eff With. His first order of business, naturally, was to announce Q1 net profits of just north of $2b for JPM just in case Wells Fargo [...]
Entries Tagged as 'jamie dimon'
No Respect… No Respect At All
March 27th, 2009 · 1 Comment · jamie dimon
We wonder if he’s having trouble getting tables at Dorsia now, too. JPMorgan’s Jamie Dimon, former contender for LOLFed’s Golden Cojones award who was recently caught whining about his vilification, showed up today to meet with President Obama and got pwned by security: Jamie Dimon of JPMorgan Chase & Co., John Mack of Morgan Stanley [...]
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Mea Culpa
March 27th, 2009 · 9 Comments · bandit, bernanke, greenspan, hank paulson, jamie dimon, Timmay
Here at LOLFed, from time to time, we like to point a gnarled finger of blame at those in industry and government whom we feel are at least partially responsible for our current state of affairs. We have done so without regard to race, ethnicity, political party, gender, collegiate affiliation, or employer. As it happens, [...]
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BoA, MS, Taking Toys & Going Home
February 12th, 2009 · 6 Comments · all ur bankz, bailout, bandit, fail, goldman sachs, jamie dimon
Ken Lewis and John Mack were not amused at being spoken to that way yesterday, before 71 members of the House Financial Services Committee – which, from the vantage point of the bankers, had to have looked like a much uglier version of the Deal Or No Deal women – and have decided that, you [...]
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I’ll Take Those
February 4th, 2009 · 8 Comments · all ur bankz, bailout, jamie dimon
First, a hearty LOLFed thanks goes out to our new Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner, for having many pictures taken in varied and hilarious poses. We like him better than Hank already just for that reason. It would be nice if he were bald, though. Ah, well. So! Further blurring the line between the free market [...]
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