If you’ve ever said we’ve been a little harsh on Bernie Madoff over the years, that we shouldn’t be so quick to judge him until we’ve walked a mile in his shoes, I have good news: now we can walk that mile. Or Alyx can, she’s into running and such.

Yes, circle November 13 on your calendars, and be at the Sheraton New York Hotel & Towers or…don’t be, really, I guess that’s entirely up to you. We probably won’t be, if we’re being completely honest. But that’s when the DoJ is auctioning off some more of Bernie’s ill-gotten stuff, including that very pair of monogrammed velvet slippers, the perfect gift for that person on your gift list whose initials are BLM and who also happens to have a fetish for Ponzi toejam.

Which, of course, is every person on your gift list.