Has it come to this? Really? Mountains of coke, dominion over millions of dollars, concealed weapons, none of that is quite enough to provide today’s Modern Banker with the rush he needs to keep his heart beating a la Jason Statham? Now he has, in the hours away from the high-octane office, to fill the void within him with training to beat other men to bloody pulps?

A black eye or row of stitches may grace John Cholish’s face when he meets with wealth-management clients at Merrill Lynch & Co.

Those injuries occur after Cholish, 26, leaves his midtown Manhattan office and heads for the gym. He spends a couple of hours most evenings at the Renzo Gracie Academy on West 30th Street, kicking, throwing punches and tackling opponents, as they train to compete in mixed martial arts.

Also, as an added bonus, in that article Bloomberg actually uses the words “Dungeon of Pain” which, along with “Massive Vibrator of Death” are the two phrases I never thought I would read on that site.

We’re left wondering if there’s a set of rules floating around out there like “Only two counterparties to a trade, one trade at a time.” “No shirts, no shoes” is sort of a given.  The real difference here is that, when you think about it, Project Mayhem actually came first for these guys.