Wells Fargo is kind of a jerk.  After Citi walked away from the Wachovia deal, because Wells Fargo gave Citi a terrible swirlie and stole its lunch money, one would think that was sufficient.  But no, Citi decided it still wanted to sue WF for the $60b it was never going to get even if it had bought Wachovia.  Then WF filed suit today asking a judge to tell C to stuff it.

Vik, we’ve had some laughs over the years, you and I.  Remember that time I put a bandit mask on you and changed your last name?  Good times, good times.  So I mean this as a friend when I tell you: GET OVER IT YOU CRYBABY.  You want your $2b back that you floated Wachovia way back when?  Fine.  But $60b is a ridiculous number.  Nobody has that kind of money now, not even the Pope.  You’re being a jerk.  And John, the Stumpf Chumpf.  You won.  You won Wachovia, the homely girl that nobody wanted but was the last one at the club one night so everyone was fighting over her anyway.  Congratulations.  Is all this necessary?  Can’t you just pick up the phone and call Vikky and talk this out like two men?  Because right now you’re turning this whole thing into another